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From The Outrageous Funny Story Files...
The Best Funny Short Stories
The Toilet Paper Miracle

Fresh from her shower, the wife stood in front of the mirror complaining to her husband that her breasts were too small.

Instead of telling her it's not so, the way he usually did, he uncharacteristically came up with a suggestion. "If you want your breasts to grow, then every day take a piece of toilet paper and rub it between them for a few seconds"

Willing to try anything, the wife got a piece of toilet paper and stood in front of the mirror, rubbing it between her breasts. "How long will this take?" she asked.

"They will grow larger over a period of years," her husband replied.

She stopped. "Do you really think rubbing a piece of toilet paper between my breasts every day will make my breasts larger over the years?"

Without missing a beat he said, "Worked for your butt, didn't it?"

He's still alive, and with a great deal of therapy he may even walk again, although he will probably continue to take his meals through a straw. Stupid, stupid man.

   

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