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Short Funny Jokes, Diets, Skiing, Aliens, Food and Work


Welcome to Page 5 of the short funny jokes, or as we like to call it, Hump Page. Let's get right down to business with jokes about diet, food, skiing, aliens, and that big bugaboo, work.

Exercise is OK for other people, but I don't exercise because it makes the ice jump right out of my glass.

Short Funny Jokes. Take your pick.
Page --   1     2     3     4     5     6     7     8     9    

  1. My husband is on a seafood diet. Every time he sees food, he eats.

  2. Diet Tip... Here's a great way to beat the dieting blues.
    When you step on the scale... ...Pretend it's your IQ!

  3. There are three kinds of men: The ones that learn by reading. The few who learn by observation. The rest of them have to pee on the electric fence for themselves.

  4. Bartender: Your wife will probably hit the ceiling when you get home!
    Drunk: I know. She’s a lousy shot.

  5. Work is like a rodeo. You put up with a lot of bull and there's always some clown wanting all the attention.

  6. If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?

  7. If you are going to try cross-country skiing, start with a small country.

  8. I don't exercise because it makes the ice jump right out of my glass.

  9. A Weight Watcher friend of mine gave up on food and took up crafts.
    This year she's building a refrigerator with her glue gun.

  10. You might be a Redneck if...
    You've been married three times and still have the same in-laws.

  11. Patient: Doctor, do you think cranberries are healthy?
    Doctor: I've never heard one complain.

  12. Diet Jokie... You are overweight if you are living beyond your seams.

  13. You know you're getting old when...
    A cute babe catches your fancy and your pacemaker opens the garage door.

  14. You can't trust dogs to watch your food.    


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